A few requirements before flying...

Late Saturday evening marked the return of my lovely wife from her vacation to Guatemala, in Central America. Kerrigan and I made the drive to Boston to meet Nichole at Logan Airport, and had a great time in the process. We had a nice little visit to the Museum of Science and then a dinner date at the Cheesecake Factory. After spending some quality time together, we headed over to the airport and took a little nap in the car before Nichole's flight landed just before midnight. She brought back with her many cool gifts, some amazing photographs, and some entertaining stories. One of the more entertaining stories, in my opinion, had nothing to do with Guatemala. In fact, it took place on the flight home, from Miami to Boston. While I found humor in it, Nichole was less than impressed. However, it did bring to mind a few things to keep in mind when flying...

If you have smelly feet, don't take off you shoes. Trust me, as a fellow smelly foot person, leave you damn shoes on. It may not completely mask your swamp foot, but it is better than exposing your sweaty socks to your neighbors. Nobody wants to know you that well, believe me.

If you have some goblins hiding out in your nose, your seat is not the place to start making your finger dance all the way up to the second or third knuckle. If you need to pick something out, make your way to the bathroom and use a damn tissue. Nobody wants to see you digging for gold in your nostrils, especially if you find something! Along those same lines, if you have a runny, stuffy nose, blow it out. Don't sit there and snort it back up. This sound is enough to make some people puke, and that is never good on a plane.

Before flying, take a shower. Nobody wants to sit next to a person that wreaks of body odor. Don't know if you smell bad or not you say. How about this, lift either arm and do a quick armpit sniff. If you don't think you smell good, the person in the seat beside you won't think you smell good. The showering process is very simple. Don't be afraid to try it out. And don't forget your deodorant!

I know that the arm rests are small, but be considerate. Don't just assume that the middle one is yours for the entirety of the flight.

If you have the urge to fart, ignore it. If you can't ignore it, make your way to the bathroom. Your neighbor does not want to smell your smelly butt air. It's not like you can open a window to make the smell go away.

Have long fingernails? Cut them before you leave. Didn't have time before you left? Tough shit, wait until you land. If the person in the seat beside me ever cuts their nails mid flight, they are going to get elbowed in the teeth. I don't want to ever find somebodies fingernail clipping in my vodka tonic or pretzels!

If you are prone to snore, don't nap. If you aren't sure, and you do snore, expect me to drive my elbow into your ribs. For example, I snore. Because of that, and the fact that I am too damn tall to fly comfortably, I don't sleep. Crisis averted.

The reason this all comes up is because Nichole sat next to that guy on her trip home. The thing is, I bet she isn't alone. I bet this same guy has sat next to you on flights as well. Now, these are pretty basic requirements in my opinion. Simply put, don't get on the plane unless you are clean. I don't think that is too much to ask. Remember, you are not flying alone, you have others around you. I'm just saying...

Black Friday, more like Crack Friday...

Well, I decided there wasn't a chance in hell I was going to drag my happy ass out of bed before the sun came up this morning. No thanks, all set with that. Now, I get that there are "great deals" and "doorbusters" at all the retailers, but I'm not fully convinced that there has ever been a deal on something I actually was interested in purchasing. To me, it's kind of like shopping at Shaw's. Sure, I can save a couple of bucks, but I'm not necessarily buying something I would normally want or buy.

Kerrigan and I did, however, decide to brave the crowds later in the morning, around 9 o'clock. We assumed the crowds would still be big, but at the very least we would have full bellies from Governor's first! After grabbing breakfast we went to Best Buy, tooled around for a bit and walked out empty handed. Then we went to my favorite retailer in all the world, Wal-Mart. Why is it my favorite retailer you ask? Have you ever been there? It's amazing. You can't walk out of that place without seeing at least one person that cracks you up for one reason or another. Well, we were not disappointed. We left here pretty much empty handed too. I got another package of cough drops and a tree ornament for Kerrigan, which is a yearly tradition for us.

All in all, we survived our abbreviated version of shopping on Black Friday. Things I learned today would be that I still hate shopping on Black Friday, even later in the morning. I've decided that I want to shop online or at small, local retailers from now on. Either that or everyone is getting a case of home brew this year. I'm just saying...

Things to be thankful for...

I hadn't intended to write anything today, but I'm a little overwhelmed by the many great posts on Facebook. It inspired me to tell all of you some of the many things I am thankful for. Now, family and friends are an obvious one. I have supportive and loving parents, an incredible sister, awesome grandparents, the greatest daughter and the most amazing wife, not to mention all of my wonderful aunts, uncles, cousins and in-laws of all varieties. I also have more incredible friends than one guy deserves. Obviously, I am eternally grateful for all of you guys. The following are some things that you may or may not know that I am thankful for...

Boston sports teams. The Red Sox, Celtics, Patriots and Bruins have brought much frustration to my life, but they have brought infinite amounts of joy as well. I have been a huge fan for years, and will never abandon ship. I remember dreaming of one day being the next Larry Bird, then realizing I wasn't good enough to be the next Eric Montross, but I watch every game I can, even back in the late 90's and early 2000's when the Celtics were terrible. I'll never forget the sheer pain I felt as soon as I saw the ball come of Aaron "F&cking" Boone's bat in 2003 (I still haven't actually seen the ball clear the fence), but couldn't wait to see the Red Sox get back on the field in 2004, when they eventually won the World Series. Good or bad, I'm thankful for the entertainment you provide me.

Beer. Dogfish Head, Marshall's Wharf, Geary's and Stone Brewing. I love you guys. Hell, I love most all breweries out there, and there are way too many to ever mention. Whether I am just drinking it brewing it myself, I love it. I will be forever thankful for the wonderful combination of water, hops, malt, barley and yeast.

Cheese sauce from the Great Lost Bear. If you haven't had it, what the hell are you waiting for?! It's good on everything. I might actually drink it by the pint. GLB, thank you!

Phish. I have been following the Phish boys since 1997, when I heard they were coming to Limestone for a three day festival that later turned out to be Lemonwheel. Since then, I have seen them 6 times, have purchased about a dozen cd's and downloaded a ridiculous number of songs and shows from the Internet. I love how every show is different. I love just watching the people at the shows. I love the randomness of the lyrics. There isn't much I don't like about them. I am also thankful that they decided to get back together!

The Daily Show. Jon Stewart and company have given me so much joy over the years. The way they point out all of the craziness going on in the world around us is greatly appreciated. I also love the way they mock Glenn Beck, that just never gets old. Jon, if you are reading this, I would love to have an opportunity to be one of your correspondents some day...

These are just a few of the many things I am thankful for on this Thanksgiving. I'm excited to spend the day with my family and Kerrigan, though we will be missing Nichole, while she is hanging out in Guatemala with Auntie Dawn and friends. I look forward to her safe return late Saturday evening, and hope she has a wonderful Thanksgiving south of the border. Here's hoping everyone eats themselves silly today! Happy Thanksgiving everyone, you are the best! I'm just saying...

Rumblings and grumblings...

Oh, hi! Remember me? Yeah, I've been on deaths door now for a couple of days. After taking the afternoon off yesterday and getting a measly 15 hours sleep, I'm back today. Of course, I get back to the office in time for an early close. Oh well, fine by me! As we get ready for the biggest eating day of the year tomorrow, I'll leave you with a few thoughts bouncing around in my head...

Everyone is making a huge deal about the new TSA screenings at the airports. What is this all about you ask?! Well, basically, if they feel you look suspicious they can ask you to get patted down, and if you refuse the pat down you can have the full body scan. Now, the full body pat down consists of just that, a full body pat down. Now, call me crazy, but I'm fine with a full body pat down if it means I am safer on the airplane. I'm not a huge fan of flying in the first place, so anything that makes the experience a little safer is just fine with me. Perhaps everyone should take an extra minute before heading to the airport to ensure they look a little less suspicious...

Bristol Palin came in third on Dancing With The Stars, and she was upset about it. Bristol, dear, you only made it as far as you did because mommy paid ABC to keep you there so the Palin name was in the news. You sucked. You were so bad you caused a guy in Wisconsin to shoot his television set. Now, as if a show about dancing wasn't bad enough, now the geniuses at ABC are putting out Skating With The Stars. Hey dude from Wisconsin, hopefully you have more ammunition for that gun...

Now, I'm obviously not a NY Yankee fan. In fact, I despise them. Along those same lines I really don't like Derek Jeter. Sure, he's had a good career, but all the love he has garnered gets old. His stats are declining, he's getting older, and he's not worth a huge contract at this point. That being said, he's been the face of the Yankees forever, and they should just overpay him like every other player and make this all go away. Since they are not, I say the Red Sox make a gross offer to him, see if they can lure him away from NY. How amazing would it be to just sign him to say F U to the Yankees! Again, he wouldn't help us at this point in his career, but it would be pretty funny!

The big Harry Potter movie just came out, and I have to say, I just don't get it?! What the hell is the big deal? Can someone please explain why these movies have people wetting themselves with excitement? Sure, they may be enjoyable movies, but I truly am bewildered by the way people get into them. To me, the Potter series, the Lord of the Rings movies and the Twilight series are an absolute mystery to me. Magic? Werewolves? Wizards? Vampires? I'm sorry, I'm not following. I'd, honestly, rather watch Gigli (that disaster of a film with Bennifer in it) or any movie with Carrot Top or Gilbert Godfried in it...

Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I'm pretty sure I'm going to eat myself stupid. I get really excited for green bean casserole, stuffing and putting gravy on everything. What I don't get excited about is that goopy cranberry "sauce" stuff. What the hell is that? It looks more like Jello than any kind of sauce. Perhaps it tastes good, but I'm not putting that weird looking stuff in my belly when I could have a second (or fourth) helping of stuffing.

Well, I want to wish everyone a happy Thanksgiving tomorrow. I'll be heading over to my parent's place with my daughter. If all goes well, we will eat our respective weights in dinner and desert. Our family tradition is to go to L.L. Bean in Freeport after dinner to walk around and try to burn off a little bit of what we ate. Also this year, the Patriots are playing against the Lions. It will be nice to be able to care about one of the teams playing on Thanksgiving for once. Anyways, I hope everyone has a great weekend and we'll catch back up on Monday! I'm just saying...

All in due time, and it's not that time yet...

I realize the commercial factors involved in every real, and quasi, holiday in the United States. I totally get it. However, what I don't get is the timing of it all. I really need someone to explain to me why the day after Halloween we have Christmas items hitting store shelves. Did I miss something here? Isn't there another major holiday stashed in there between them? Sure, Thanksgiving isn't quite the commercial megaholiday that Halloween and Christmas are, but it's still there, sitting almost exactly in the middle. It's real, it happens, I've been there for it 30 times already. Why, then, is it necessary for me to walk into any retailer on November 1st and see aisles of Christmas decorations from floor to ceiling? Give me one holiday at a time, let's not get carried away and get ahead of ourselves here. I want to be able to cram enough turkey and stuffing into my body that I can't move for several hours first, then go Christmas shopping, not vice versa.

Now, I'm sure I'm going to get some shit for this, and that's fine. Someone has to say this, because I know a lot of you are thinking it, and I mean both you ladies and you guys out there. Tom Brady's hair is freaking magnificent! I mean, that bastard has a beautiful head of hair. Now, perhaps I say this because the best I can grow on my 31 year old head is about what a 6 week old baby has, or perhaps it is because it is just plain awesome. Besides, for all you haters out there, if any of you got Giselle drunk enough to marry you, you would pretty much do anything she wants, and if she wanted you to have long, flowing locks, you better believe you would be going shaggy as fast as possible!

Back to the Christmas thing, when does everyone put their decorations up? Growing up, our family tradition was to put everything up the day after Thanksgiving. My sister, mother and I would be bouncing around the house, filled with all sorts of the "Christmas spirit", while my father would just shake his head at us until about the 20th of December, when he finally joined the rest of us. To me, any earlier than that is simply wrong, but beyond that, it's kind of a fire hazard, right? I mean, that's a long time to hook electricity up to a drying piece of timber, isn't it?! Why not just use candles like the old days, I mean, no quicker way to start a fire than with actual fire! I'm just saying...

A little bit of this, some of that, and a whole lot of something else...

I had every intention to give you all some happy crap today, but as my day gets more annoying, you are going to get more ranting than anything else today. I'll start with a quick recap of last night, and then it's all over...

We went to the Merrill Auditorium last night and watched those hosers, the Barenaked Ladies, perform another highly energetic, highly entertaining show. It's the first time either Nichole or I saw them, and they were a lot of fun. I knew probably 90% of the songs they played, which is always nice when you see a band for the first time. It was cool to see people of all ages there as well. I really enjoy the way they keep the banter going throughout the show, and the occasional raps are worth the price of admission. I've been a fan for years, so it was nice to finally check out a show. I would recommend checking them out, even if you only know a few songs, they are a lot of fun.

Quick public service announcement from yours truly to all pedestrians out there. If you are not in a crosswalk, or if you have a Don't Walk sign flashing in front of you, you are now fair game, and I will no longer attempt to stop. I've given you years of leeway on this, and it ends today. That doesn't mean you stop, look at me, see me coming, then put your head down and act as if you didn't see me. This also doesn't mean that because you are in a crosswalk you have the right of way. For your convenience, in the Greater Portland area, more specifically, downtown Portland, there are fancy lights that tell you when and when not to cross the street. If you can't read them, learn, your time is up. I don't care if you are a business professional, a homeless person, or an art school hipster, if you don't follow the simple pedestrian rules, you better hope you have insurance.

Four Loko, the wonderful combination of malt liquor and caffeine is in hot water due to its high ABV (6%-12% depending on state regulations) and high levels of caffeine. Four Loko is one of those fun drinks that keeps you going all night with its energy component, and gets you blind drunk with its malt liquor aspect. Sounds good, right? Turns out it has fast become the drink of choice on college campuses and among high school students because it is dirt cheap and potent. When alcohol and caffeine are combined people report feeling reduced sensations typically associated with alcohol believed to result from caffeine counteracting the depressive effects thus keeping the individual more alert. However, when the caffeine wears off the person feels the full effects of the alcohol. Then we find ourselves drinking in excess because we still don't feel drunk, then bam! Completely destroyed! Now, do I think it needs to be banned? I'm indifferent. I see it as no different than Vodka and Red Bull or Jager Bombs. I would never drink Four Loko, so it doesn't bother me. Though, if I had to choose a side, I say ban it.

Word just came through that Lisa Murkowski, the right in candidate in the Alaska Senate race, pulled out the win, over Sarah Palin endorsed Joe Miller. I'm also hearing that Palin is strongly considering running for President in 2012, not that this comes as a surprise to anybody that follows politics. I'll give my two cents on the subject, and I feel it's not too far off. If you can't get enough people to vote for the candidate you endorsed in your home state, I don't see how you have a snowballs chance in hell winning in the primary, let alone the Presidency. Besides, wouldn't you rather be hanging out in the Alaskan wilderness than in an office? I mean, you did say that, right?

Speaking of the Palin's, did you see that Bristol is still doing her thing on Dancing With The Stars? I'll be honest, I have never watched that show. In fact, I would actually kick my own ass if I did. However, I stay on top of all this pop culture stuff, and I have seen that she has been one of the lowest scoring dancers week in and week out, and she is still there. Now, I'm not big on conspiracy theories, but me thinks something is going on here. Did the Palin's pay the producers to keep her around as long as possible to keep the Palin name in the headlines?

I noticed on Twitter today that Eva Longoria has filed divorce from her basketball playing husband, Tony Parker. Apparently they have a few "irreconcilable differences" that they are unable to work out. I'm guessing one is that she is smoking hot, and he has not been nearly as good on the basketball court as she once thought he would be. She sees the writing on the wall, she will be fully supporting him within 5 years, and she ain't having it. The good news is, if Nichole lets me, I have a chance again! I'm just saying...

Fantasy football, and some old fashioned frisbee flinging fun...

So, I recently made my first real attempt at Disc Golf in a good many years, and I have to say, I'm not horrible. I mean, forget the one disc I lost in the middle of a pond, right after fishing it out from the side of the very same pond. You would need to ignore my first drive too, where my throw might have gone 30 feet to my left. There was also that one hole where I chucked it directly into the woods on both the first and third shots. But, other than that, I did decent. Once I figure out the best way to chuck the damn thing, I should be a pretty good frisbee chucker. The one thing I did learn while playing was that it uses some different muscles than I am used to. My back, sides and elbow were a bit sore the day after.

Fantasy football season is now over half done, and for the most part, I'm completely screwed! First of all, I have too many teams, which was my own damn fault. I typically have a couple of teams, one I pay for, one I don't. I have always seen it as a great way to pay attention to the whole league, not just the Patriots. However, with five teams, I am constantly put in a position where I need to cheer for one guy in one league, and against the same guy in another league. Not fun. Take last night, for example. I needed Jeremy Maclin, WR from the Eagles, to give me 20 plus points to win in one league, but I need Michael Vick, QB from the Eagles, to have a bad game in a different league in order to win. Now, unfortunately for me, Michael Vick had a huge game, but Maclin didn't do enough to give me the win, causing me to lose in both leagues, but such is my luck this season.

Across my five leagues, I am a combined 18-31-1, which is pathetic, especially considering I have good teams in each league. I have not caught a break, in fact, I'm a whooping 0-10 in one of my leagues. I haven't won a damn game, nothing, nada. Terrible. I am a consistent top 5 finisher year in and year out, but this year is looking mighty different. I think next year I will go back to 2 teams, maybe 3. It's too hard to have to cheer for teams like the Giants or individuals like Ben Roethlisberger or anybody on the Jets. It makes me feel ill having to root any of them on. I'm just saying...

Weekend wrapup, more like weekend nap up...

Going into Friday night I was basically death warmed over. I had been hacking and coughing for a couple of days, my nose was running like an out of control faucet and I was so tired I needed toothpicks to prop my eyes open for the evening commute. That, my friends, is an awesome way to start your weekend! Well, let me tell you, I decided to ignore how craptastic I felt and put on my dance pants... No, no I didn't. I ate my dinner in bed and was lights out while watching the Celtics game. In fact, that was most of my weekend. I literally slept most of my weekend. Feel much better today though, so I would say it was well worth it.

Sunday was a different story, and thank god. We got moving at a fairly decent time and took our furry, brown pooch to Bradbury Mountain in Pownal. Now, mountain may be a bit of a stretch, but it's a great place to go for a hike or a bike ride, and it was just gorgeous there yesterday. We hiked up the South Ridge trail and eventually made our way to the summit to enjoy the beautiful view. It was a great hike and Yawkey, our rambunctious lab had a blast. From there we went to Brunswick to run a few errands and poke around the indoor flea market. After getting a few things we needed, a few things we didn't, and not finding other things we did need, we made our way to the Lion's Pride.

For those of you who have not yet been to the Lion's Pride in Brunswick, what the hell are you waiting for?! As they put it, it's where art, food and beer meet, and boy oh boy are they right. They have a great selection of hard to find beers from all over Europe and a few closer to home, and they have an excellent food menu. I got my favorite, the Chimay Burger, which is covered in the most amazing cheeses. Nichole got the steak and cheese, which may be moving up the list to my new favorite, as it was incredible. The staff there are awesome. They are extremely knowledgeable, very passionate about both their beers and their food, and they are just plain fun to chat with. Nichole and I tend to go at an off time, like around 3:00. We usually have the bar to ourselves and have a good time trying different beers and chatting up the bartender. I highly recommend getting your butts to this fine establishment in Brunswick, and soon!

We capped the weekend with a viewing of the Patriots game from our sweatpants on the couch. I may have only seen the first half and woke up covered in sweat at 1:30 AM, but it was nice to know that the Pats smacked the Steelers around a little and even though Tom Brady didn't give me enough fantasy points to beat Pierson's Pats, I'll take a New England Patriots win every time. All is all, it was a damn good weekend, and I'm feeling 100% better today. I guess it's time to tackle another week. I'm just saying...

Someday I want to take my talents to South Beach too...

I had a whole post done earlier today, and when I went to post it I lost it?! I'll give you the Cliff Notes version and call it good, I'm too flu-like to type it all again...

The Patriots lost to the Browns, and that makes no god damn sense. I'm hosting tryouts this weekend, we can put together a better, more consistent bunch, I'm sure of it. Good news is we have the Steelers and Colts coming up...

Lots of celebrities took part in the NYC Marathon this past weekend, including Jared "the Subway dude" Fogle. He was quoted after saying that "If I can do it, anybody can get off the couch and do one to two miles." True, Jared, but that was a dick move, it's going to be much harder for me to get out of running next time Nichole asks. NOT COOL my friend, NOT COOL!

Did you know that the Giants are no longer in New York, they moved to San Francisco? Hell, they even won the World Series. I had no clue! And they have a pitcher that colors his beard and has a mullet. I normally pick up on crap like that, huh.

Speaking of baseball, it's time to talk free agency. The wonderful time of year where baseball teams across the country over pay aging players with diminishing talents. How much will the Yankees overpay Derek Jeter? Who will the Sox get to replace those awful pitchers in the bullpen? Oh, hot stove, time for you to heat up, I've missed you!

Dear NFL Commissioner Roger Godell, stop fining players for hard hits. Unless they are a blatant helmet to helmet hit, stop! Football is a mans sport, and it is meant to be played at 100%. These guys know what they are getting into. Besides, I love seeing moments like those of Brett Favre against the Patriots, where he didn't know his ass from his elbow. Couldn't have happened to a better person. Except maybe that ass hat Eli Manning. What a useless turd that guy is.

Jon Miller and Joe Morgan are out as Sunday Night Baseball announcers on ESPN. If it weren't for Tim McCarver and Joe Buck, Joe Morgan would be the worst announcer alive. I'm very excited to know that I won't fall asleep during every broadcast he does, it will be nice to have someone with a pulse doing the games, hopefully. Now, who do we talk to at Fox to get rid of McCarver and Buck, they are terrible.

The Bowl Championship Series, or BCS for short, is such a crock of shit. Until there is a playoff in college football, I'm not going to take it seriously. I will, however, continue to root against Notre Dame, Florida and Miami, while continuing my allegiance to the Florida State Seminoles, despite many years of mediocrity. Ugh.

This is the sports world according to me, I'm just saying...

Hey dude, nice mullet!

Brew Fest weekend. I'm already excited to plan the festivities for next year. That's how much fun we have every year at this annual event. Saturday did not disappoint. For those of you that were there, our large group could be seen roaming the Portland Expo building sporting our W.W.J.B. t-shirts, and pretzel necklaces. What the heck is W.W.J.B. you ask?! Well, that would be short for What Would Jesus Brew, of course. Our group, who we have coined The Brew Crew, has grown over the past few years, originally starting out as a small group of friends that wanted to turn the annual Maine Brewer's Festival into something more than just a chance to try some different barley infused offerings. Our first year was a modest dozen or so people taking a limo to and from the festival in some locally printed t-shirts that we designed. Last year we rented a school bus from the fine people over at VIP Charter, and they were kind enough to transport us again this year. Our shirts have evolved too. We've sported everything from "I'd Tap That" to "Chug Life" to this years "W.W.J.B.". We've even created a Facebook Fan Page for everyone to be able to stay up to date on what we are working on next.

As for the festival itself, it was a great time again this year. I had the opportunity to try some new offerings that I had not yet had, like the Sebago Barleywine, which was aged in Bourbon barrels and kicked me square in the jiblets, damn! Sebago also had their Local Harvest (an APA made with local hops and barley) and Hell Awaits (their imperial porter) on cask, which were excellent! Peak Organic had some excellent selections, and Geary's, one of my top Maine breweries, had their Wee Heavy and Imperial IPA, two of my favorites. There was some good music playing in the background, and there was lots of food options. As usual, a great event.

Our group of about 45 people, all wearing our matching t-shirts, were a rowdy bunch, as usual. We all enjoy a good time, and want everyone to be having fun along with us. Our shirts got a few looks, mostly smiles, but a few hairy eyeballs were seen amongst the crowd. To those people I say, go to your local 7-Eleven and buy yourself a sense of humor. No disrespect was meant, just trying to be a little tongue-in-cheek. We actually sold a half dozen or more to patrons in the crowd, the shirts were a big hit. The bus ride back from the Portland Expo to Gritty McDuff's in the Old Port was entertaining also. We picked up about a half dozen new people (for a small fee, and yes Nichole, Amy paid), and had lots of drunken photos snapped. Post brew fest we all went in different directions, and a small group of us landed at Sebago for dinner. Apparently, from what I have since heard, we acted up, which I totally disagree with and would call bullshit on. I have been told that one of the manager's posted on his Facebook wall "what would jesus brew? he wouldn't act up in a restaurant". The the manager at Sebago that posted this, I say suck it to you my friend. We didn't act up, we did nothing out of the ordinary for a group of 10 in the Old Port on a Saturday night. Now, if you are jealous because Brew Crew was having fun while you were working, I'm sorry, take the night off and join us next year. Until then, get over it.

The night would end early for Marcole and Casey. One member of our trio was slightly intoxicated, and I won't mention names, but when Casey and I convinced Nichole that she was too drunk to drive, despite her repeated attempts to prove us otherwise, we caught a ride back to New Gloucester from my father. Normally a ride home from the bars from your father would be embarrassing, but when faced with the idea of getting an OUI, I'll take the ride in the far back of a Ford Escape from my father any day of the week. The ride was great, the farts however, were less than great. Though, looking back, I guess I contributed to a bit of the overpowering stench, and for that I am sorry.

All in all, the Maine Brewer's Festival 2010 was a great time. Brew Crew did it up again, and we did it right. I look forward to a new theme and some new faces next year. Until then, check out our page on Facebook, and send it along to your friends. In closing, I offer you this... Can you imagine what would happen if Santa Claus, Count Chocula, Chuck Norris and the Easter Bunny hooked up after a night of Patron shots and pizza rolls? Neither can we, but we do know that you don't want to miss out on the Brew Crew! I'm just saying...

A new format and a commitment to consistency...

The past few weeks were crazy. I barely remember half of it, and the parts I do remember involved lots of running around and work. It's nice to finally be able to take a deep breath. While I'm still not over what happened Tuesday night / Wednesday morning, it's nice to see things slow down a little. I would like to apologize for not being more consistent on here, it was hard to focus my thoughts onto the page with all the political happenings going on around me. With all that behind us, I plan on putting more emphasis on the blog, but in a much more structured way. I've been very political lately, some people enjoy it, some people won't read it. I'm looking to start doing a little something for everyone going forward. I also have a hidden agenda...

I've been thinking about how I want to structure things on here, and I feel like the best way to move this forward is to have specific topics discussed, and scheduled for certain days. Going forward, my plan looks like this...

Monday - Recap the weekend events, either personally or from the news.

Tuesday - Discuss the sporting world.

Wednesday - Pot Pouri. No, not the smelly stuff you have in a basket in your house. This is more of a day for whatever. One week it might be discussing global warming, the next it could questioning why monkeys like to throw their poop, I just don't know what the topic will be, but it will be different each week.

Thursday - Rant day. I need to have a day to just get shit off my chest. This will probably turn into a day of Glenn Beck or Sarah Palin bashing, but it will depend on what is going on in the world.

Friday - I plan on doing something different every other week. One week will discuss the state/national political scene. The other week will be a platform for me to toss out my thoughts and ideas. I plan on running for office at some point, so I will use it as a chance to get feedback from all of you, be it positive or negative. I have a mental plan in place for how I want to go about running for office, but I want to use the time leading up to it as an opportunity to talk to all of you, get your feedback and thoughts, even if you tear me apart, I want to hear it.

I figure with a specific topic scheduled for each day of the week you will know what to expect going in to it each day. Now, this of course puts some pressure on me to deliver. I have been less than stellar at being consistent on here, so I'll have to get my shit together. I just want to go back to having fun on here. I've been so caught up in politics that I have pushed the blog to the side, and I'm back. Thanks to everyone for continuing to read and follow along, this has been fun so far, and it's only going to get better! I'm just saying...

Now that the dust has settled, I want the dust to come back...

I had planned on having a nice long celebratory post yesterday. However, here I am, on Thursday, just now able to swallow the bitter pill that the underwhelming majority of Maine voters fed me. As you all know, our next governor will be none other than Mister Paul LePage. It actually hurt my fingers to type that, and I have to admit, I threw up in my mouth a little. Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I want to see him fail, that's just dumb (please note that a good number of Republicans have said that about President Obama). I mean, if he fails, all of us Mainers fail. We don't want that. We need to change things in Augusta, and LePage has promised lots of that. I'll be the first to tell you that I don't think he is the right person for the job, in fact I think he is far from the right person for the job.

LePage ran on the Tea Party platform, despite his many attempts to tell you otherwise. Hell, he even had the head of the Maine Tea Party lead the people gathered during election night in song. Part of the Tea Party platform was feeding off anger. Voters across the state and across the country are angry. We are angry that so many people are still out of work. We are angry that the economy hasn't gotten better. We are angry because we don't feel our elected officials are always working for us, which is what they should be doing. That being said, we aren't looking for a dictator or a fist shaker. We need to have a diplomatic leader that is able to work well with both sides, not just a few from one side and all of the other. Politics is no different than a relationship, you need to give and take to make it work. It can't be all one sided, and you certainly can't act like a bully. There are going to be times when you agree to something you aren't a big fan of, but you know what, it has to be done for the greater good. Do you think I wanted to go to "Clueless: The Musical" last time I was in NYC? Not exactly, but my beautiful wife did, so I went along. We have to make concessions along the way to make this state better. Will LePage be able to do this? Time will tell.

Voter turnout was less than stellar considering the magnitude of this election and the contrasting differences between the 5 candidates, as well as the few write-ins. Maine typically expects about 50-55% of registered voters to get out and cast a ballot. Gubernatorially speaking (made up word, I know), we had a whooping 46% vote this time around. First of all, that bothers me a little, but that is beyond my control. Secondly, LePage needs to keep in mind that he won this election with just 38% of the total vote. While that worked out to be the majority, it's underwhelming at best, and might I point out that it also means that 62% of Mainers voted against him. Nearly two out of every three people didn't want him to win, so he has a long way to go to get the approval of the actual majority of voters.

Having been very involved in this election, I got to see things a different way than normal this year. I also saw a lot because I was supporting the Independent in the race. I am a registered Democrat, and I have to say, I am more than a little bothered by the lies, distortions and half truths they put out against Eliot Cutler. It was very disturbing that they would play that game. Now, the Republicans didn't do anything to win me over, let's not forget that they did much of the same. The Independents in this race kept it very clean, with none of them personally running or approving any mudslinging. Some people say that the dirty way works, but I have to be honest with you, I hate it. I really don't care what you say your opponent will or won't do, I already know that from following along, what I want to know is what you will or won't do, according to you.

As for all those commercials and mailers, please stop! I mean, I don't want to put anybody out of business if they are the people producing such materials, but they are a waste of money. Instead of the candidates, or the many PACs and groups funding the candidates giving all this money to smear the opponent, why not take and dump all that money directly into the economy. Why not donate it to struggling non-profits or to improve a local school or library? What about applying it directly to the state deficit? I know none of this will ever happen, but all that money raised by Karl Rove's crew and the others just like it could be used a whole hell of a lot more wisely if you ask me.

Needless to say, I could go on and on, and I have before, about why I don't think LePage will make a good governor, but now we have to just wait and see. Let's see if he sticks with his promises that he has made and see if he keeps ruling with that short temper that got him into more than a few scrapes along his way to winning the election. If I thought hiding in my basement for the next 4 years would make this go by faster I probably would. Perhaps now is a good time to hike the Appalachian Trail like I have always wanted to. Either way, the real question on everyones mind is this, how long before he punches someone in the face or gets thrown out of the Blaine House? I don't think he makes it two years without facing some serious investigation. Problem is, Maine will have a much worse black eye than whomever is on the other end of LePage's fist. I'm just saying...