It's holiday party season, and we've all been to one. Some places do a little breakfast, others close early to do a Yankee Swap and snacks. I've worked for a couple of different drinking establishments that have closed down for the evening and opened up the bar and had a band play. First of all, why is it that a restaurant/bar can do more for a holiday party than most any office I have ever worked for?! Anyways, the holiday party is always a good chance to get to know your co-workers, though, usually in a way you never cared to, especially when it is open bar...
Many of you know that Nichole and I started our courtship thanks in part to the open bar at the Bull Feeney's Christmas party back in 2006. The free flowing of shots and beer made it much easier for me to approach her and work my "game". Also that night, there was a whole lot of crazy going on all around us. I, unfortunately, was witness to a bad case of fire crotch at one point. It's funny, but red heads still scare me a little. If you've seen the movie "Waiting", picture the scene where that chick flashes her bush, and it's very unkempt. Yeah, I still have nightmares. Anyways, this goes back to my statement that these parties usually give you a chance to know your co-workers in a whole new way.
Well, back to the present. Buck's Naked BBQ had their holiday party last night. They rented out Venue on Forest Ave in Portland. Velorasaurus kicked out some jams and the drinks were on the house. Now, apparently all the ladies decided to dress up. Looking back, I'm not sure dressing up is the proper term. I might call it dressing out. Why? Well, you give this group of barely 21ers a few drinks and what the skirt is intending to cover up is covering nothing at all. At one point Nichole and I each had ourselves a little Britney Spears upskirt moment with this one chick. Shortly after that I had the misfortune of seeing another chick haul her skirt up to scratch her upper thigh. Wow, hot mess comes to mind. Speaking of hot mess, since when did 2 drinks over the course of a little over an hour get a person sloppy drunk?! Jesus, either I drink way too much, or these chicks cannot handle their booze. At one point, after the Yankee Swap Smackdown, this one girl was so drunk she couldn't even keep her eyes up when she was trying to convince me to switch with her. I'm still not sure what she said, but she was entertaining for a few minutes.
All this brings me to a very important question, which is, what is it about holiday parties that makes us just not give a shit about how we act? Can you think of one time when there wasn't at least one person bombed, making an ass of themselves? I can't, even when the parties were tame there was always at least one drunk jackass that would eventually piss in the punch or motor boat the bosses wife in front of everyone. Unfortunately, I may have to be that guy if we end up having our little breakfast here at the office this year, since somebody has to do it! I'm just saying...
About Me
- Mark
- I've always wondered if people actually read this stuff. I never do when I'm on other pages. Well, in case, for some strange reason, you find it necessary, I'll give you a little knowledge. I was born in The County. For those of you who don't konw better, that would be Aroostook County. For those of you who do, your jokes won't work on me, they are lame. I'm the son of an investment banker that squandered his every penny on tuna fish sandwiches in the late 80's, and my mother was the lead singer for the Bangles. Neither of those is true, but again, I'm convinced nobody is reading this anyways. I met my wife at a carnival, and we were married by the bearded lady in front of the entire clown brigade. I have a daughter who is training for the 2012 Olympics where she will compete in the Triple Jump and Javelin. We live in a nice little shanty in the woods and are hoping to one day have running water. Any questions?
