Date: Saturday, March 6th, 2010
Location: Rivalries, 10 Cotton St, Portland, ME 04101
Nichole and I got invited to "The Farmer's" 40th birthday party, where she had put together a nice gathering of people, some good food, and some entertaining getting to know each other games, topped off with some Chubby Bunny (stuff as many marshmallows into your mouth while saying "chubby bunny" until you can no longer say the words). We brought our friend Emmi with us for the night out on the town. Let the games begin!
We walked into the party just as the ice breaker game was starting up. The birthday gal had put together a grid that contained different details about the guests lives that others might not know. The point of the game was for us to go around introducing ourselves to each other and asking specific questions to find out who fit into each box. The first person to completely fill all the boxes was supposed to be the winner. Most of the questions were simple ones like "Did you graduate from Portland or Deering High School?" or "Have you ever been to a Jimmy Buffett concert?". There was one question that everyone was a little nervous to ask, which was "Are you a cougar?". How do you approach that? Could you get slapped? Turns out that our new cougar friend was totally cool with it and actually introduced herself that way.
About 30 minutes into the party, one of the guys saunters over to ask us some questions, see if we can sign his sheet. He introduces himself as Trent, from New Jersey. He is slugging on his double Jack and Coke, and it is clearly not his first, or even his second. He goes on to ask how my wife Emmi was doing, much to the chagrin of Nichole, who quickly put him in his place. Now that he knows Emmi is not there with a guy, it is game on for Big T. He spent some time rubbing her back, telling her some crazy story about this guy from her hometown that he knew that broke his penis while sleeping with his bosses wife (I don't know, don't ask) and continued to work his large frame (275 lbs to be exact, he reminded us about 8 times) as hard as possible to get her attention. At this point, it's pretty clear she is more than uninterested, so I'm hanging out in between them playing a little defense. We see an out, and head for the door before he has a chance to pursue any further. Crisis averted, phew!
Turns out, after we left, the party got kicked up a few notches. Shortly after our departure, the crew we left behind got shut off at Rivalries, or perhaps sent packing after marshmallows made their way downstairs and hitting other patrons. Then they decided to head on down to other watering holes to keep the drinking going. RiRa apparently took one look at Big T and sent him in the other direction, apparently he should have gone with singles, not doubles. They hit up Gritty's, but one member of the wolf pack ended up passing out, in the seated position, on the sidewalk out front. Whoops! I'm happy to report mom that we weren't there for any of the madness, though, my birthday is just two short months away. I'm just saying...