After a week of increased feelings of a cold coming on, as well as decreased levels in our bank account, I'm excited we are staring at a three day weekend. I have spent nearly every night since last Sunday working until around 11 getting financials done for a couple of clients, not to mention the three lunch breaks that were spent working for another client, on top of putting together a bunch of schedules and reports for the auditors at the office. It's been a crazy work week.
On top of that, our furnace crapped out on Sunday and set us back a decent amount to get it running again. On a good note, I now know the ins and outs of a furnace, and am able to clean it myself now, which will save us a decent amount of money each year. We also had a friend of ours pass away on Sunday, as you may have read in my last post. Another fun note (sarcasm...) from this week is that Kerrigan sprained her ankle jumping off a tall snowbank at school. She's been hopping around the house for a couple of days now, but seems to be getting better as time goes by. She's more like her father every day, willing to try anything people dare her to.
So, in honor of having such a mentally draining week, I'm going to rip on some things, I figure making fun of other stuff will make me feel better. Here we go...
1. Pat Robertson, the whacky, outspoken, televangelist claims that Haiti's 1791 Slave Rebellion is to blame for the massive earthquake that occurred on January 12th. He says that Haiti made a pact with the devil to get out from under French control, and they have been cursed ever since. Rush Limbaugh, the radio host and conservative political commentator, claims that the earthquake benefits President Obama because it makes him look "compassionate" and "humanitarian", while at the same time bolstering his standing in both the "light-skinned and dark-skinned black community in this country." He added: "We've already donated to Haiti. It's called the U.S. income tax." Guys, come on, didn't your mothers teach you that if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all? In other words, shut the hell up, morons.
2. Facebook statusi (that is the plural, right?!) asking me to repost something if I believe in it. To the person/people who started this, please stop. I obviously support our troops. We have all had someone, friend or family, that has had cancer. Just because we don't post something doesn't mean we don't care or aren't thinking about them on a regular basis. I would rather see people post something like this... "Put this as your status if you have eaten your own boogers or pissed in a swimming pool. ♥♥♥ The majority won't put it on, because unlike cancer, eating boogers or pissing in a pool is taboo. ♥♥♥ Break the silence. ♥♥♥ In honor of all pool pissers and booger munchers, you are loved too."
3. Brett Favre, Kobe Byrant, Lebron James and Eli Manning - I just don't like you guys. Never will. Don't even try to convince me.
4. To all you fools out there that find it necessary to try to blow up a plane, are you kidding me?! Trust me, your god does not want you to kill innocent people, and anyone who is trying to convince you otherwise is off his freaking rocker. Oh, you have been promised endless amounts of beautiful virgins when you get to heaven. Let me tell you something buddy, that is not, I repeat, not going to happen. Why don't you do us all a favor and quit with the whole war nonsense. It's going to end badly for everyone, and what good does that do?
5. To the dimwitted Wal-Mart employee in Auburn that wrote a bomb threat on the stall wall yesterday, your plan to get the night off didn't work, did it? Haha. Now, of course, I am drawing my own conclusions, and I have no evidence to back up my statement, but come on. A bomb threat is written on a bathroom stall last evening at the Wal-Mart in Auburn, Maine. Really?! Why would anyone put a bomb there? I'm certain it was some chick who just met a dude online and didn't want to be at work because she wanted to find out more about the guy (who, mind you, is probably not at all who he says he is, cuz that's what internet stalkers do). Next time, just find someone to work for you, it's a whole lot easier, and you won't get into any trouble for doing it.
Wow, I'm feeling better already! I'm just saying...
About Me
- Mark
- I've always wondered if people actually read this stuff. I never do when I'm on other pages. Well, in case, for some strange reason, you find it necessary, I'll give you a little knowledge. I was born in The County. For those of you who don't konw better, that would be Aroostook County. For those of you who do, your jokes won't work on me, they are lame. I'm the son of an investment banker that squandered his every penny on tuna fish sandwiches in the late 80's, and my mother was the lead singer for the Bangles. Neither of those is true, but again, I'm convinced nobody is reading this anyways. I met my wife at a carnival, and we were married by the bearded lady in front of the entire clown brigade. I have a daughter who is training for the 2012 Olympics where she will compete in the Triple Jump and Javelin. We live in a nice little shanty in the woods and are hoping to one day have running water. Any questions?
